Monday, January 21, 2013

MARTHA TELLS OF COURTING WITH BUGGY

 Marilyn had these pictures all set with a post made up when I called her.  She was describing the buggy to me over the phone.  I told her to send some of the pictures to my parents computer, which she did.  When I got to my parents to see the pictures, I realized that is a courting buggy and whose it was. He is a young fellow, who is a friend of Kevin and Erin's-he and the girl he is courting were at Kevin and Bridget's wedding with the new courting buggy. So, to be nice,  I called him up.  He was surprised that the English lady (Marilyn) that took the pictures knew me and okayed us putting the pictures on here-as long as we tell him when it is on so he can go to the library computer and see it.

Our young folks can start attending singing at age 16.  Singing is held on Saturday night at the home of one of  the young folks parents home.  It is usually held in the barn, as it is at our home.  The young folks sing for about two hours, then finger food is served and in the warm weather they have games.  Parents or a young couple supervise the young folks for the first two hours, but leave for the rest of the evening.  Even though we are not attending, at our house, we can keep an eye from the second or third story windows.  We don't watch all the time, but check and make sure everything is all right. 

Our meeting (church) also has other activities especially in the spring, summer and fall times.  They may have a dinner, baseball or volley ball game or some other activity for the young folks to attend.  In the winter parents have ice skating, sleding, skiing, etc. plus, of course, something for the young folks to eat.  One thing about Mennonite and English young folks a like-they all love to eat.

We do not have rumsprings like the Amish do although some of our young folks do things we wouldn't want them to.  Kevin had a car.  Sometimes they go on day trips.  Kevin and the boys went to Niagara Falls and stayed over night and to Virginia Beach.  Boys and girls do not go on overnight trips together.  Some also smoke cigarettes, drink, go to movies, listen to music, and more. 

It is at the singings that we hope our young folks will meet their future spouce.  We believe this person should also be Old Order Mennonite by the bible 2 Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with ubelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness?

When Kevin asked Bridget to marry him, she said she would not consider it until he got rid of the car and turned in his drivers license, which he did.  Unfortunately, Erin, our son and Kevin's brother  now has his license and is driving the car. 

The courting buggy is purchsed either by the parents or the young fellow when he is of courting age.  We purchased a used one for Kevin, which will be passed down to his brothers.  The buggy in the pictures above is a brand new one-recently made-for a friend of Kevin and Erin's.  You notice all the silver tone circles on the back, the deer plate, the extra mirrors and reflectors.  Even the horse has green on him.  Young gentlemen like to really dress up these courting buggies-within reason. 

When they were married, Kevin's was passed down to his brothers.  As the fellow who owns the above buggy purchased his buggy himself when he marries a lot of the mirrors and reflectors will come off.  The silver will be covered with black paint.  The deer plate will go and a plain orange one will go on.  The horse will be wearing black instead of green.  When they have children, they will have to sell or trade it for a bigger buggy.

I know young folks do things us parents don't know about.  Kevin and Bridget were saying they did things we don't want to know about.  When Joseph and I were courting I am sure we did things our parents don't know about.

Dating is suppose to be done on Sunday afternoon and evenings in the home of the young girl.  They talk, play table games, etc.  Of course, they go for buggy rides, walks and more.  The days of not knowing who is dating who is pretty much over. Also from just dating on Sunday, are getting more days of the week.  We were so glad when we found out that Kevin was courting Bridget. 

This is the general way our young folk court.  When the proposal is made-there are no engagement rings, parties, etc.  The man buys the lady a clock to symbol they will be spending the rest of their together.  The wedding is published (announced) at meeting (church) three or four weeks before the wedding.  I believe I told everything else from Kevin and Bridget's wedding post. 

Be With the Lord,
Martha

22 comments:

New York State Of Mind said...

Hope you like Martha's post and the pictures. It is cold here 19 degrees this morning and it is suppose to get colder later in the week.

Marilyn

Veronica said...

Really enjoyed Martha"s post this morning. The pictures were also great. I hope you had a wonderful weekend Marilyn. It is very cold here in St. Catharines also. I think that courting is wonderful and although were are not Amish or Mennonite but atr Christian our middle son is using some of the same principals with his girlfriend. They are trying to stay pure until marriage. Not what usually happens in the world anymore. I am sure we have all done things in our day that we are not proud of. I am curious if the boys get permission from the father to court his daughter? Well I may have more questions later so until then have a great day!! Veronica

New York State Of Mind said...

Hood Morning Veronica,
I am so glad your son is trying to stay pure until marriage. That's the way it was when I grew up, but it seems to have changed, which is said. I have written your question down. Your questions are always welcome.
Hope it warms up your way,
Marilyn

Vickie said...

Another wonderful post Marilyn. The Old Order Mennonite courting sounds very similar to Amish courting. I especially like the pictures you took.
We are currently at 3º right now. It is expected to be a high of 6º today. :(

jodie said...

Very much enjoyed reading about the courting and loved the pictures of the buggy.
Its 18 here and will start dropping down.
jodie from MO

New York State Of Mind said...

Good Morning Vickie,
Glad you liked the post and pictures. We are suppose to be getting weather like yours later in the week. I want to see if I can get the anti-freeze checked in my car today to make sure it can take it.
Marilyn

New York State Of Mind said...

Good Morning Jodie,
Glad you enjoyed the post and pictures. Hope you and everyone can stay warm during this real cold season.
Marilyn

Chasity said...

I really enjoyed the post, thanks for sharing!

New York State Of Mind said...

Thank you, Chasity,

Marilyn

annie said...

I enjoyed reading this post, the buggy photos are wonderful, quite a change with the extra color than what I normally think of. Thank you so much for sharing!

New York State Of Mind said...

Hi Annie,
I didn't understand the extra color on the buggy, either, that's why I asked Martha when she called. After seeing the pictures, she told me what it was. You are more than welcome.

Marilyn

Melissa M. said...

Great post from Martha! I am a hopeless romantic and enjoy reading anything about courting, marriage and family.

New York State Of Mind said...

Hello Melissa,
I will tell Martha you enjoyed the post. Will have to see what other romantic and family posts Martha and Jean can come up with.
Marilyn

New York State Of Mind said...

Just checked stats on the computer and we have hit and passed 10,000 page viewers since this blog was founded in October. I never expected so many so fast. Of course, I am sure, man of them are mine because I stop here a lot to answer the comments, but still that lots. I also changed my profile picture to one of the horse and buggy I took pictures of. I thought that would go better with the Amish and Mennonite that is on the blog. I don't think Pierre is too happy that I took him off. He will get use to it.
Marilyn

Amish Stories said...

Nice job Marilyn with this post and like the old order Mennonite buggies here in Lancaster I see some fancy pin striping on this one, so this buggy looks almost exactly like ours here.

I have even seen some go even more fancy which includes bigger side windows that were tinted and more chrome here and there, so some of the younger Mennonites push the envelop just a little for some extra style.

Of course all of that does depend on the Church district that the buggy owner lives in, which would determine how far they could go. Richard

New York State Of Mind said...

Hi Richard, Glad you liked the post. I couldn't figure out what it was when I first saw it-that's why I told Martha. It was all fancy and smaller than most. When I sent the pictures to her parents and she saw them=she called and told me. Martha said they are only allowed so much and much of it has to go when they get married.

Thank you for stopping. I appreciate it.
Marilyn

jodie said...

Marilyn, please ask Martha what kind of songs do they sing when courting. Also do they yodel also.
jodie from MO

New York State Of Mind said...

Hello Jodie,
I have the questions written down to ask Martha.

Marilyn

Countryside Reflections said...

Martha's post is very interesting. I'm always surprised at how fancy and new looking a Mennonite buggy is. The Amish who live near me in the southern part of Western New York don't have buggies that are nearly as nice as the one in the pictures. I'm told that "our" Amish are very strict with low incomes compared to others in the country. There must be quite a bit of difference between the Mennonites and Amish. I would like to hear more about the difference if Martha or Jean can explain in future posts. ~Doreen

New York State Of Mind said...

Hello Doreen,
I have written the questions for Martha or Jean. When I came across that buggy-it is the newest one I had ever seen. Never seen one so "fancy" either.

Marilyn

Anonymous said...

Hi Marilyn, Really nice posting from Martha w/the pics, too! May I inquire as to the cost of a new courting buggy? I assume when one needs a family buggy the cost rises considerably. Also are they insulated at all; due to the winter weather conditions of this portion of NYS? Thanks+Blessings, Carol

New York State Of Mind said...

Hello Carol,
I have made note of your questions and will pass them on to Martha. Glad you liked Martha's posting and pictures.

Blessings to you and yours,
Marilyn