Tuesday, January 6, 2015
SARAH - JOHN'S WIFE, TELLS OF BEING NEWLY MARRIED
Getting married is all new from helping my Mother at home. There, my mother, was usually the head of household. If she was not home, for some reason, then I took over, but even then what I did answered to my Mother. So having my own home is a new way of life..
Another situation is living with someone who dated, courted and married you. Not having lived together before John finds my ways of doing things and thoughts - I find out his. The attitude in his family is completely different that I was raised. Not as strict as my Father was. Now I am not putting down my Father. I loved him and I love my Mother, but their ways were different. For example, I asked John what he wanted for dinner after breakfast one day. He said he didn't care. So I started beef stew. John came in at lunch and said he wanted pork chops. When I told him I had already started beef stew he said okay, we can have pork chops tomorrow. If it had been my Father told my Mother he wanted pork chops my Mother would have to stop the stew and make sure we had pork chops for dinner.
Before he makes major decisions, John always asks what I think or my opinion. I was so surprised when he first did that. My Father made all the decisions in our home. He never asked my Mother. My Mother said it is kind of hard on her to make decisions, since my Father passed, because my Father always made them. It is for me too, but I am getting use to it.
We appreciate all that people did for us when John and got married and my Father's passing. I know my Mother and John's Mother set up the house, but I changed some things around the way I wanted.
You have to set some sort of a schedule to run a house. Must do that to get things done everyday. I do not write it down, but I keep it in my head. John sometimes laughs at my schedule. He says schedules are made to be broken. What he doesn't realize is that he has a schedule, he just doesn't realize it.To do all his chores: milking the cows, feeding the animals, barn chores, on and on - he must have a schedule to get it all done in a day.
When first married, it is Amish custom that John and I got to our friends and relatives home visit, receive our gift, and have a meal. Do to my Father's passing, we had a discussion and decided not to do this. We spoke with Bishop Eli who agreed with us. But, people have been coming to our home, visiting, bring a gift and having a meal with us. Sometimes they even brought the meal. John and I wondered about this so we said something to Bishop Eli. He got a smile on his face, and said, maybe they want to see your new home. So John and I think he had something to do with the people coming to our home. We do appreciate it.
As I was talking of schedules, an Amish woman must cook meals, bake, do laundry clean the house, and do sewing. Right now I don't have a lot of sewing to do because most of our clothes are fairly new. I do work on hankies, quilts, and rugs to sell. Also, I will be going to quiltings, visiting, helping others when needed, and more.
As I said John feels schedules are made to be broken. During the beautiful weather, he came a couple of times during the afternoon and said let's go for a buggy ride. I told him I had chores. He said they will be there tomorrow. This beautiful weather won't. So we went for the rides. Sometimes we would just take a walk. Anna says John is very much like his Father.
I am not sure what you wanted to know so please ask questions and I will come on again to answer them.
Trust God's Wisdom,